Monday, March 19, 2012

Repost

Here is a re-post from when Avery turned one.  I am posting it again because it is all so true this second time around.  And because I think it is hilarious how hard I thought I had it....if only I knew.  :)

The Difference Between a Newborn and a One Year Old
1)      A Newborn can give you sore nipples, sleep deprivation, and the constant feeling that you are obviously a novice at the baby thing.  A one year old gives you tennis elbow, thumb tendonitis, and the constant feeling that you are obviously a novice at the whole toddler thing.

2)      A newborn eats, sleeps, and poops pretty much all day.  A one year old runs around terrorizing the dogs, plays with his toys, reads his books, figures out how to start climbing on the furniture, dumps over the dogs’ water dish, rearranges the furniture, climbs in the refrigerator when it is open, terrorizes the dogs, picks up pieces of grass from the carpet and hands them to Mommy, pulls out every single toy in his baskets, snuggles with the doggy bed, kisses and hugs Mommy, terrorizes the dogs, pushes his car around the entire house, bangs on his piano, “helps” with the laundry, makes random phone calls on Mommy’s cell phone, eats five times a day, terrorizes the dogs……….

3)      A newborn catches people’s attention when he makes that cute little “I’m a brand new baby” cry when you are out in public.  A one year old catches people’s attention when he is hollering at the top of his lungs because you won’t let him chew on the box of Colgate toothpaste that you just threw in your shopping cart.

4)      A newborn may require several clothing changes throughout the day due to spitup, the occasional diaper blowout, and because it is just so darn fun to play dress-up with all of his cute, brand-new baby outfits.  A one year old may require several clothing changes throughout the day because…well, because he is a one year old.

5)      A newborn snuggles at any time of the day.  A one year old snuggles on HIS time and at HIS discretion (but that just makes the snuggles all the more precious).

6)      A newborn is super easy to photograph at any time of the day.  A one year old requires practically strapping him down to a stationary object before you can get a decent picture of him that doesn’t come out blurry.

7)      A newborn can be carted around to just about anywhere during your day full of errands.  You can TRY to take a one year old just about anywhere but sometimes it is way more of a hassle than it is worth.

8)      A newborn has no idea what a cell phone is.  A one year old can somehow sign you up for a $3.99 monthly subscription to a gaming service via the internet feature on your phone (internet that you have yet to figure out how to use yourself).

9)      A newborn does not have the eye-hand coordination or mobility skills to grab the dog’s tail and pull as hard as he can.  A one year old does.

10)   A newborn does not possess the gift of speech yet.  A one year old can carry on a conversation with you, complete with hand gestures and facial expressions.  It may sound Klingon, but it sure is fun. J

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